Well, if I'm wishing for things...

I got the following email from a coworker about scheduling some of our work duties:

I need to make a new hotline schedule for Summer (it will start June 6).  Could you please email me your availability/shift preferences for Summer by May 13?

Is it bad that I wanted to respond with: "I would prefer not to be working here anymore so please don't give me any shifts".

Should have known...

It's been a tough few months. So as much as this NaBloPoMo (for me) should be about creativity and exploring different types of writing, figuring out what type of writer I want to be and creating a consistent writing platform, it certainly hasn't been the time for me to make a plan. So, what exactly have I been doing? Considering a new job, finding new jobs, getting increasingly hateful towards my current job, appreciating my coworkers making the current job worth standing.

Over the weekend, I also was in Iowa celebrating my grandpa's life with my family. It was a long, hard weekend. And there's so many things I could wish to express to my grandpa and to my family and things people told me about my him. I just don't think I'm at the point to share quite yet.

Here's an idea

Taking action over an injustice is MUCH more satisfying then complaining about it.

Maybe because I'm the sort of person who keeps adding to my list of things to do when life gets rough. But maybe because when you try to change something, it's much more likely you'll have an impact.

And no one likes a cry-baby.

My alarm is my best friend

I woke up over an hour earlier than I usually do because the cats were rummaging around in my closet. After shooing them out, I realized my head and nose were stuffy. A cold? Welcome to Friday? So, I'm awake now, writing a blog post before I even go to work and hoping the coffee I brewed today is magic. And by magic, I mean laced with cold-killing drugs.

I honestly wish I was a person who woke up and could just spend time drinking coffee, eating a bowl of cereal and reading blogs while getting ready for work every morning instead of rushing around. I normally hit my alarm for well over 30 minutes. I just CAN'T wake up or get out of bed. I know I have to and it would be SO much easier if I had more than 30 minutes to get ready. But I can't.

Anyone have any tips? Besides just being late to work?

Happy Friday?

P.S. Is it just really cruel to be sick on a Friday? I have things to do this weekend! Final Fridays downtown, celebrating a friend's birthday, Band Day parade with the girl scout troop I volunteer for and roasting coffee beans!

Deep breath

Last Friday, I made plans to go see a movie with friends over in KC. I rushed home after work, changed clothes, attempted to redo my makeup and stuffed a snack in my purse (and by purse, I mean giant bag that will fit snacks enough for 10 people attending a movie - that's how I roll...) and hit the road. The minute my tires exited the Lawrence city limits and my spedometer cruised to 70 (okay, probably 78) I felt like a different person. I reflected on the previous 2 weeks. My shoulders felt 20 pounds lighter, I turned up the radio and sang to every obnoxious pop song that came on the radio. I made myself laugh at a joke about Train, Collective Soul and being confused about being in the 90s again. I would have tweeted it if I hadn't been going 75, ok 80 miles per hour. Holy cow, I've been stressed and was not even dealing with it. I've been focused on some changes at work and getting into a workout routine. I've been freaking out about my limited cash flow -well, more about the paycheck I can't keep because of all my student loans.

I realized I had not been out of Lawrence since I returned home after Christmas with my family. I love this town, but two months without leaving this Lawrence is too long. Sometimes, you just need a change of pace or change of scenery. I was definitely getting a change this evening. I got some good KC BBQ and saw Alice in Wonderland in 3D. I vented to friends about other friends' stupidity and the changes at work. We talked wedding plans (not MINE of course) and job searches.

But I still had things to do last weekend. But got none of them done Saturday because of what I would call a depression like state. I am not actually depressed but last Saturday was awful. All my stress had built up and was now falling down and crushing me. And I was sitting on the couch letting it. So, I made a decision last Sunday to get up and do the things I needed and wanted to do. I went to the gym. I hate some fruits and veggies, I went on a walk with some friends at a park, I went to the grocery store and bought some good-for-me and yummy food. I came home and cooked. I was in a better mood because I had decided to be. Despite the stress.

My Favorite Things (about this weekend)

Reciting Anchorman quotes over breakfast with my roommate and friend, Becca.

Making chicken parmesan with my roommate (she's so good at it!) complete with a fancy salad. And we had all the ingredients in our house already! Progress!

Making banana bread late, late on a Sunday night. (yum!)

Eating junk food with my friend Becca while we drool over hot curlers. And by hot curlers, I mean attractive men who curl. Like, you know, the Olympic Sport?

Listening to my roommate talk to her mom in Korean.


Things I don't like:
having to go into the office to catch up on work
KU losing a basketball game :(
co-workers leaving

Yeah, there's a building named after me on campus, so what?

Ok, so there isn't a building named AFTER me, per se... but there IS a building on campus with my name.

Bailey Hall, home of many thrilling and exciting departments in the College of Liberal Arts & Sciences.

It's also the bus stop right before mine when I ride in the morning.

*Some* of the bus drivers are, let's put it, a little more enthusiastic than others. It's cute and slightly encouraging that someone driving a bus can be that cheerful in the morning. It's not cute when they announce *your* name rather loudly over bus intercom with more zest then you're used to and you almost fall off the bus seat.

Um, good morning?

to me

Dear Self,

I know you don't like self-evaluations, self. But I know you know they're good for you and for the general well-being of your career, office growth, etc. So quit wasting time and just do it.

Love,

Me

P.S. Self, your hair looks pretty today. And I'm glad you wore those shoes.

In a perfect world

Briana: When we have our own event planning company, our hours won't start until 10 AM (because of all of the late night events we'll have of course) but we'll aim to be at the gym together by 8 AM to exercise and get coffee. (at least in my head :) )
And every night a certain someone will sing me this song:


In a perfect world. I think I'll work on it.

But right now, I took the day off from work so I could work on my paper due for class on Thursday. So, I should probably actually do some writing.

On second thought...

This past week, I came to a realization. I don't LIKE my graduate program. Let me tell you, this is a very unsettling thing to realize. I thought about doing this higher education admin program before I even left undergrad, but the thought of my student loans from my out of state tuition gave me good reason to find a job that paid more than $9 an hour. So a few months after graduation, I was hired for my current job. I found out that I could take one class a semester and have it paid for by my current employer? Great, right?

Being a goal-minded person, I looked into the higher education admin program because, well, that's pretty much what I was doing and why the heck not get a master's degree? I applied this past February, was admitted and took my first elective over the summer. It was a tad overwhelming, simply due to the fast paced nature of the summer class and because I was super busy with other things in my life. But I survived, and they didn't kick me out, so I continued this fall.

I realized last week that my loans would not be deferred because I was a student again - shoot! It dawned on me that I was only tolerating the work because it made my budget easier to handle (that happens when you don't have to pay your student loans) and that is probably the WORST reason to be in school. A coworker said she had so much more fun in grad school than as an undergrad. I stared at her in disbelief. Granted, I'm working full-time and doing school part-time, but I don't think grad school is something you do because you "should" but because you "want" to. I also realized, I don't think advising/working at a university is something I'll do forever. I like it now, but I sometimes think I would like to go back to my j-school degree and do the marketing thing. But who knows what will happen. That's the exciting part, right?! I do know, another coworker went through the same grad program and she said it only goes down hill from the class I'm in now. And she completed it full-time, which took 2 years. We both are that rare post-undergrad that ENJOYS working opposed to missing the life of a college student and constant classwork. So, I'm taking her thoughts on the program very seriously. She still feels that, 6 months later, she's recovering from being in the program.

What I really would like to change about my life is the amount of income I have. I don't want to change my job - I genuinely enjoy it and the people I work with. I would like to explore new things and take risks. And if I have 10 hours a week to work on a class I don't like, what if I spent that time doing what I enjoy and in which I find value? Life, I think, would be that much greater. There have been people in my life recently who, in the way they act and think about the way they live there life, have influenced the importance I put on how I spend my life. It's a great lesson to learn and to apply in life.

As logical as this grad program is, I just don't think my heart is in it. And I've learned enough in a few years that our time should only be spent with people and doing things that we love. Why would I deny myself that?

Thought for the week:
"God doesn't give you the people you want, He gives you the people you
NEED: To help you, to leave you, to love you and to make you into the person you were meant to be." - unknown

Thoughts on getting (flu) vaccinated

I'm a generally healthy person. I usually get sick once a year for a couple days and, if anything, under medicate myself in the process. Thanks to a roommate a couple years ago, I'm better about taking medicine (it helps!) but I'm not so quick to turn to nyquill, etc.

I'm sure I've had the flu, but I've never (in my memory - help mom!) had a flu shot. The flu, if you have been living under a rock *ahem* I mean if you have not been paying attention, is kind of a big deal this year. For the next 2 weeks, I am still in one of the "priority groups" and am eligible for the H1N1 vaccination. Children and young adults, 24 and under, in addition to pregnant women are encouraged to get the shot.

So, I should definitely get one, right? I do not know.

There has been a lot of discussion in my workplace about getting the vaccination. There are 2 of us in the priority group for the vaccine and there are a couple people encouraging us to get it. They believe we should get get the shot so we don't bring the virus to people in the office who are not yet eligible for the vaccine when we ourselves could have been vaccinated and prevented it from spreading. Logical, yes?

I DO work with a lot of students in their early twenties who are more able to spread the virus like wildfire (ie dorms, apartments, etc).

BUT, if there are limited vaccines available, shouldn't it go to someone who is more at risk for complication to occur if they were to contract the virus?

Be a Winner!

Please see Mrs. Newlywed's site to enter to win some fabulous monogrammed towels. SOOOO adorable!

Work hard/play hard makes life pretty fun. This week definitely fit the bill. Planning on being as lazy as possible today. Except, I should fold and put away my TWO WEEKS of clean clothes on my bed. *SO* lazy sometimes!

Ooh, except there's lots going on in Lawrence today. Not to mention Panera or Milton's is calling my name. Oh, unless you've been to Lawrence, you've probably never heard of Milton's. Well, this charming little paper on the east coast recommends the french toast if you're in town. Let's just say, if you're in town, you MUST go. Just be sure to beat the church crowd!

The Lunch Hour

So, I haven't posted a blog in 8 days. I feel bad about it. Why? I don't have that many followers. I don't blog for a living. But I wanted to have a more relevant blog this year. One of my early 2009 goals. (Not a new year's resolution, because my NYR was to have more fun.)

Yet, I have nothing to post about. I'm sitting here in my office over lunch with no inspirations. I could talk about my new office with a big, room high window that I loooove. But there's not much to say about it. Someone left so we all shift to better offices depending on seniority. I have this much seniority ----> l l. Yes, between those 2 lines. Not much. But enough for a window.

So, I'm looking out my window (even though the day is gray), and pondering blog topics. I've been thinking about trying to position this blog so it has a specific topic and it's more marketable (this is my PR degree kickin' in), but my interests are all over the place and I use this as more of an outlet for several things. I could write about my viewing of "Watchmen" this weekend, but I'm still absorbing the experience. Yes, I absorb movies. One thing I can say I did love about it was the music. I also decided "The Sound of Silence" is definitely on my list of top 5 favorite songs. I need to more thoroughly listen to my "Best of" Simon and Garfunkel CD.

See my problem? Work, movies, music. And I definitely can write about current events and politics when I get the inspiration. Never one thing. I guess that's what makes me the scatter-brain I am. Although, the only comments I get are on the most random blog entries. So, maybe I need to go with the "stream of conscious" posts more often?

I'm so sensitive.

Sometimes you have those days where A LOT happens. Today wasn't supposed to be a particularly busy day outside of the usual Thursday meetings but most of the time, life does not go the way you would expect. And it is when those things happen that you learn a little bit more about yourself. So, without going into much detail about what happened, I'll outline the new things I learned about myself today.

1. I am very good at being able to pick up moods and attitudes of those around me. If someone is uncomfortable or mad or annoyed, I can sense this. This is helpful if you want to ask for something and don't want to ask at the wrong time. Or sometimes, people just don't have the patience for what you need to talk to them about. Today, I just kind of new something was coming and it was NOT fun.

2. Along the same lines, my day of meetings has always made me a little crazy by the end of the day. First it was the caffeine, then just general loopyness (yes, it is a word). Today, I deduced what was causing my swing in emotions on the day before the best day of the work week. Like I said, I'm sensitive, but I also have a reflective personality. I pick up on what others are feeling and how they are acting and incorporate it into how I am feeling and acting. So, after hours of meetings on Thursdays with lots of people, discussing lots of problems and challenges, I have a lot of attitudes and feelings to reflect. Thus, I am all wound up about the day. This is also why my closest friends, and those I get along with well, are usually friendly, outgoing and talkative people.

So, that's what I learned about myself today. Here's to tomorrow!

Do I need to tell you what you ate for breakfast, too?

Some things about working with undergrads (now that I'm not one...)

I'm beginning to question the intelligence of the many, many students with whom I attended KU. Coming straight into my position from being an undergrad (ok, yes there was a 6 month delay...but I labeled that working on my mental health...) there are going to be a lot of students who come through my office who I actually know. I'm sure it will take 3 years or so for everyone I knew as a student to be flushed out. This is me being optimistic. I knew some smart people. Not the kind to take 8 years to graduate. I hope. Kind of weird, yes; but weirder (and more embarassing) are the things that these students (well, not the ones I know) believe about the graduation process at KU. You "graduate" and officially have a degree once you COMPLETE all your classes. You "walk down the hill" in May after you graduate OR whenever the heck you want to. In my case: I WALKED in May 2007 but officially GRADUATED in December 2007. Kind of cheating, whatever, but I wanted the experience.

A short synopsis of walking down the hill at KU: The only official, university-wide graduation ceremony is in May. All the graduates line up in awful black polyester on Memorial Drive and proceed through the Campanile (proceed makes this sound easy. It is not. 4,000 people is a lot to get through a tower...). THEN on the other side of the Campanile is a hill. And NO, not just a lovely hill like the one in your backhard but a BIG hill in which you walked up for (at least) four years earning you "KU Calves". So, we all parade down this hill with friends and family taking pictures, crying, etc and the ceremony is at the bottom in Memorial Stadium. Everyone's name is NOT called (but who needs that - the REAL photo op is coming down the hill) and the Chancellor speaks. So, to a general outsider (aka a non-Jayhawk) this might not sound exciting AT all. Well, it is and it has been done for about 100 years now, so deal with it. We like our nostalgia and tradition at KU!
SO, with 4,000 people (plus 10,000 screaming fans, I mean family members) everyone is screened before they walk down the hill, right? WRONG. Seriously, who has time for that? This is about as organized as 4,000 people can be with a couple of well placed signs and crowd control ropes. So, you can basically walk down the hill however often you want. But I wouldn't for several reasons. 1. Did I mention black polyester? In May? In Kansas? Right...moving on. 2) There's this little thing called IF YOU WALK THROUGH THE CAMPANILE BEFORE YOU ACTUALLY FINISHED, YOU WON'T GRADUATE. Seriously. Maybe a myth, but I would NOT want to mess with something like that. 3) Did I also mention this is freakin' one of the coolest things to do? Ever? On my list of top 5 favorite experiences. You don't want to demean it by doing it more than once. Unless you get another degree, then by all means do it again!

So, back to my point. You may *think* you're graduating. You walk, etc, pomp, etc. family, etc., circumstance, etc. But, did you finish that incomplete class? Did you transfer those juco hours? Did you REALLY need 45 junior/senior hours? Yes, yes you DO need all that to officially be granted a degree.
So, when a student emails asking, did I graduate in May and we respond, "no, because your hours didn't transfer" and then you come back with "but did I walk?" Well, here begins my theory on the intelligence of some people. We do not know if you walked. Did we hold your hand? Did you see us take a picture of you? Geez.

Silly undergrads. I can say that now since I am no longer actually an undergrad.