My Favorite Things (about this weekend)

Reciting Anchorman quotes over breakfast with my roommate and friend, Becca.

Making chicken parmesan with my roommate (she's so good at it!) complete with a fancy salad. And we had all the ingredients in our house already! Progress!

Making banana bread late, late on a Sunday night. (yum!)

Eating junk food with my friend Becca while we drool over hot curlers. And by hot curlers, I mean attractive men who curl. Like, you know, the Olympic Sport?

Listening to my roommate talk to her mom in Korean.


Things I don't like:
having to go into the office to catch up on work
KU losing a basketball game :(
co-workers leaving

I'm trying to be POSITIVE here...

There's been lots of stuff that's happened in the 9 weeks of this year that I'd rather pretend didn't happen. But instead of complaining about THAT, I'm going to talk about the fun/awesome things that DID happen.

My boss called me feisty yesterday which I'm totally okay with.

I was asked if I had a 5 year plan. After staring blankly at the people who asked I said "I don't." A few hours later, I realized I'm also totally okay with this.

As a part of my job, I help students plan to get their degree. Sometimes I receive not so nice emails. But sometimes I receive emails that I love. Here is one:

"I received my diploma today, 2-22-10, in the mail. I will be forever grateful to you."

I love that.

The KU Men's Basketball team is rockin' the '09-'10 season. Every Saturday this month I've spent at least 2 hours watching basketball. That makes for a good Saturday! Three more games left in the season and 3 more wins until the team has won 2,000 games overall. That's. A. Lot. Of. Games. They are 12-0 in conference play and they have also already clinched at least a part of the Big 12 title. That's 6 seasons in a row. That's called OWNING the Big 12. Okay, I'll stop gloating now... (But I LOVE KU basketball!)

(Disclosure: KU DID lose 1 game this season, but that was ALLL the way at the beginning of January. Practically a different season!)

Photo from kusports.com

god of dreams and preparing an argument; a random collection of the day

Cranberry Fact of the Week:
The word “Murphy” was also a slang for sleeping. The word probably derived from “Morpheus” – the Greek god of dreams and sleep.
Thanks to Design*Sponge for that fun little factoid.


Weirdest thing I said yesterday:

"You don't expect to go through a day & have to prepare an argument as to why heroine is bad."
I could try and explain the context but I think not knowing is more fun.

More on Bailey Hall

Bailey Hall was named after Edgar Henry Summerfield Bailey, the first faculty member in the Chemistry Department at KU.

In 1905, Bailey Hall was the home of the Chemistry department and 2 faculty members discovered helium. Yes, helium. The element.

In 2001, it was added to the National Register of Historic Places.

Current departments/programs:

Humanities and Western Civilization

Women, Gender and Sexuality Studies

Communication Studies

African and African American Studies

Center for Russian, Eastern European and Eurasia Studies

American Studies

Center for European Studies

Yeah, there's a building named after me on campus, so what?

Ok, so there isn't a building named AFTER me, per se... but there IS a building on campus with my name.

Bailey Hall, home of many thrilling and exciting departments in the College of Liberal Arts & Sciences.

It's also the bus stop right before mine when I ride in the morning.

*Some* of the bus drivers are, let's put it, a little more enthusiastic than others. It's cute and slightly encouraging that someone driving a bus can be that cheerful in the morning. It's not cute when they announce *your* name rather loudly over bus intercom with more zest then you're used to and you almost fall off the bus seat.

Um, good morning?

top searches

Top 3 visits to my blog by google searches:

"things i like about coffee things i like about you" (from this)

"fall in love three times" (from this)

"i've longed to discover something as true as this is, so with a thousand sweet kisses-i'll cover you." (from this)

I should just make this a lyrics/quotes blog. Gets me my most traffic ;)

I got your swag!

Has everyone heard of Swagbucks? You can earn bucks for searches you do when you're logged into your account (I usually earn a buck after every 3 or 4 searches). After you earn so many points, you earn prizes. Right now, I have 42 swagbucks (from probably a month of moderate use). I could get a $25 e-gift card from restaurants.com or save up for Season 5 of House (60 swagbucks). You can make your default search in Chrome or Firefox Swagbucks so you don't even have to think about where to go to earn the swag ;)

to sign up:
http://www.swagbucks.com/refer/bailann

Becca: "we need to make a fort or something and make it a no-drama zone"

Truer words have never been spoken.

So who has a set of construction plans for a really sweet (and drama-resistant) fort?

to me

Dear Self,

I know you don't like self-evaluations, self. But I know you know they're good for you and for the general well-being of your career, office growth, etc. So quit wasting time and just do it.

Love,

Me

P.S. Self, your hair looks pretty today. And I'm glad you wore those shoes.

thank goodness

I like blogging and reading the inspiring and inspiring posts from other bloggers. But sometimes it's just another thing I have to do. But when it becomes something I have to do, it seems to have stopped being something I want to do. So, I don't. But it's hard to figure out the things I want to make my priority. Maybe because it is winter and I've been grumpy for WEEKS, but there are few things I actually want to do. Maybe because there is enough crappy things going on that I'd rather just watch movies and escape.

But fortunately, I still check out my reader every few days and a little bit of my hope comes back.

A hopeful/reassuring Love Story by Sara at Snapshots.
A breath of fresh air by Chelsea at Chelsea Talks Smack.

Thank goodness for that.

Advertising, football and controversy: CBS's gray area.

I have a friend here in Lawrence, Scott Winer, who has an interesting perspective on the recent decision by CBS to not broadcast a commercial about a gay dating website during the Superbowl (<--do I have to pay for that?!) Definitely something you should check out.

As a graduate from KU's William Allen White School of Journalism, this is such an interesting situation. Ethically, socially and media-related.
The Superbowl is such a huge advertising phenomenon and every year the cost of a 30-second commercial and banned commercials is news-worthy. Thirty-seconds of air time for, usually, America's most prominent brands. Is Coke really going to convince us to drink more Coke? Especially if Pepsi doesn't advertise? Ironically, the fact that Pepsi IS NOT advertising is news. Especially since they are planning on donating the money. Basically, it's a big deal.

Specifically in this year's situation, it comes down to ethics. Going into Journalism, I always had the idea that you do/write about what is right. But after my Ethics class, I was definitely more aware of the gray areas in journalism; both in the areas of marketing/pr and reporting. Is CBS doing acting on what's "right" (whatever that is) or are they sticking to their policies that they've recently changed? Is it one in the same? I don't know as much as I could about the situation, so I don't know.

But what's "right" for the American people to view (because something like 83% of the U.S. watches the Superbowl - it's an incredibly American thing to be a part of) CBS, or whichever network broadcasts the game, gets to determine what's appropriate. Usually, the biggest offender is GoDaddy.com. It's gotten to the point, I believe, that they make commercials with the sole purpose of being rejected, getting attention to their commercials online anyway, without having to pay the cost of the Superbowl commercials.

So, I am not really sure what the right answer is. But it certainly is an interesting question.

"the risk that I'm takin' "

This song came out last year but I heard it this morning for the first time in awhile and I remembered how amazing it was. It's simply, a breathtaking, beautiful song. And the video is refreshingly sweet. And, of course, Beyonce is gorgeous.

Rules

A couple years ago, I discovered my aunt had kept a list of "rules" my cousins and I had made when we were kids playing together at a family gathering. She ended up shrinking the list, making copies, laminating and making magnets from it; because really, what more basic rules do you need for life than the ones you create when you are 8 years old? So, I give you: The Rules.

Thoughts:

This one I keep on my desk at work. My aunt's boyfriend actually keeps copies of the list at meetings he goes to for his company. A fun and cute aspect to any business meeting, but also a reminder to "play nice". An important thing even as a grown-up.

I was 8-years old and while I did go on, at the tender age of 11, to win the 5th grade spelling bee at my elementary school (it was BIG time!) I didn't know SPITTING had two 't's. But I still think no SPITING is just as important of a rule. 2 rules in 1. Genius.

Despite this list being created in approximately 1993, I pretty much know why each rule made the list.

#1, #2 and #4 were because there were boy cousins. And any boy under the age of 10 (well, any age really) needs to learn to keep their hands to themselves.

#3 probably came from my sister who, at the age of 5, needed to know everything, much like myself. But we kept secrets from her because SHE didn't know how to keep a secret.

#5 was probably also from my sister who thought I was a big meanie and always got her into trouble (I was only able to avoid trouble myself because I spoke softly while my sister yelled for the whole house to hear - so she attracted the punishment. Not my fault I was a clever fighter!)

#6 was definitely from me because I was (still am?) completely insecure and worried no one liked me. Even my cousins. I like, well LOVE my cousins and am still somewhat close to them today. So them including me was important.

#7 Our parents raised us (somewhat) well so we were (sometimes still are) responsible children. And responsible children shared their toys (or video game controllers).

#8 It lasted until my sister was 18 (and I was 21) but she and I argued more than any other children my parents knew. We were good kids, but we could infuriate each other more than any other individual on this planet. We still can, we've just learned how not to. Most of the time. So I'm pretty sure our cousins added this to the list to keep us in line. Because if it was a kid rule, it was gold.

this abyss

A just read this Le Love post and the title stopped my breath. I just recently wrote an email (yeah, I'm a wimp and put it in an email) that included the words: "worth fighting for". Quite a bit of feeling I don't normally share went into that email and, thankfully, I still don't regret it. Maybe because it wasn't totally rejected, but it certainly didn't move us forward, either. The (what seems to me GIANT) step backward was still there. There's this abyss between us and while we have to figure out our own lives, in these difference places, we're also eyeing the abyss, trying to see if one of us can make the leap across.

/depending on how this whole thing goes, this post may one day disappear. But I hope it doesn't.

Piece of Me

1. "You can do anything. But you can't do everything." - David Allen (found via sunshine and wine)

It drives me crazy not to be caught up on what's in my Google Reader but I keep adding so many blogs to it (you people are hilarious!) there are usually at least 400 unread items. Sometimes, like when my laptop stops working, it reads 1,000+ and I can hardly handle the stress. I have the same problem with work and personal email. I will read it and deal with it later (or forget it exists).

2. "I watch you spin around in the highest heels / You are the best one, of the best ones -Dashboard Confessional

Delicious is my new favorite tool. I use it to bookmark lyrics of amazing new songs that catch my interest on my Pandora Ray LaMontagne station, recipes, or laugh-out-loud-and-your-coworkers-probably-think-your-crazy blog entries by fun new bloggers you've found (like Marie Antoinette).

3. "Please forgive me if I act a little strange / feels like lightning running through my veins" - David Gray

I hate not having a solution. Especially when it involves other people. But right now, we're at a stand still. And my heart is aching because of it. I can't let go but it's not happening right now. I hate the phrase "wait and see" but I guess we'll have to.

What Matters Now

I will straight up admit I got this excerpt from lauren nicole love. Thanks to her for finding amazing things :)

An excerpt from Elizabeth Gilbert's book What Matters Now (a free eBook here)

We are the strivingest people who have ever lived. We are ambitious, time-starved, competitive, distracted. We move at full velocity, yet constantly fear we are not doing enough. Though we live longer than any humans before us, our lives feel shorter, restless, breathless...

Dear ones, EASE UP. Pump the brakes. Take a step back. Seriously. Take two steps back. Turn off all your electronics and surrender over all your aspirations and do absolutely nothing for a spell. I know, I know – we all need to save the world. But trust me: The world will still need saving tomorrow. In the meantime, you’re going to have a stroke soon (or cause a stroke in somebody else) if you don’t calm the hell down.

So go take a walk. Or don’t. Consider actually exhaling. Find a body of water and float. Hit a tennis ball against a wall. Tell your colleagues that you’re off meditating (people take meditation seriously, so you’ll be absolved from guilt) and then actually, secretly, nap.

My radical suggestion? Cease participation, if only for one day this year – if only to make sure that we don’t lose forever the rare and vanishing human talent of appreciating ease.

Happy Tears

I was in 9th grade when my emotional sensibilities kicked in. We watched "The Odyssey" in my English literature course and when Odysseus' wife, Penelope, realizes her husband has returned after 17 long years away, I wept for them. Thankfully, the lights were off in the classroom and my silent tears went mostly unnoticed by my classmates. That same year, I watched "City of Angels". And Nicolas Cage's previously unfelt pain was like my pain. He gave up everything for Meg Ryan and then she was gone. I set next to my friend since Kindergarten, Caroline, as we both tried to hide our tears. Apparently, we were saps.

But I didn't get it from any stranger: graduations, particularly important birthdays, high school dances, meaningful Christmas gifts, "Forever Young" by Rod Stewart; all produce tears from my mother's eyes. My sister and I used to make fun of her, now we embrace it. Especially since we're usually right there with her. My sister decided to make my mom a scrapbook of family photos for christmas. She started in October. I contributed scrapbooking materials, my sister's boyfriend picked out the book, and his son (my sister's semi-stepson) created his own page full of pictures and stickers. We decided weeks ago my mom would bawl like a baby when she opened it. A week or two before Christmas, she commented on this to her boyfriend's 5-year old son who responded, with alarm: "why will Cappy (Cathy) cry?". My sister told him our mom would be crying happy tears, not sad tears. But the tears came far before Christmas morning, when my mom eventually opened (and cried over) her scrapbook. Christmas Eve, she had my sister and I open identical presents. Small, silver bracelets that read"Sisters are different flowers from the same garden". A few glasses of wine in, and obviously, we were a little emotional about it.

A few times in the past couple months, I've found myself crying for no particular reason. Usually, in the car when I have nothing but my thoughts to keep me company or when an emotional song hits me, juuuust right.

Example:

• Laughed Until We Cried by Jason Aldean

More Jason Aldean music on iLike

But a lot of the time, I'm just thinking about all the good right now: my family, my high school friends, my college friends, my Lawrence friends, my coworkers, my job. Life isn't perfect, but I'm living it. Everyday, I'm doing what I want. I'm enjoying what I have. I'm dating someone and trying not to freak out or do that thing women do. I'm just glad I get to spend time with someone I am so grateful to have met this year who also happens to be an incredible person. Other than that, I don't want to push it.

So, there's all this good stuff? And I'm appreciating what I DO have, opposed to lamenting what I DON'T. I think that's what us humans would call happiness. And I'm thrilled to be there! May you always cry more happy tears!

7 days to celebrate

At 330pm on Thursday, December 17, I emailed my final paper to the instructor for my grad class this semester. I felt that 50 pounds had been lifted off my shoulder. Grad school wasn't the worst idea/decision I made this year but it is definitely high on the list.

I could have used a drink that night after work but, having been knee deep in research regarding state funding of public universities, I realized I had 7 days left to get all my Christmas celebrating in. So Thursday night, I cleaned the house. My roommate and I had both been all over the place for about two weeks, so the place had been a little neglected. And I was having a guest over Friday night and thought it would be good hostessing to have the place at least LOOK clean. Friday at lunch I grabbed some wrapping paper and starter logs for my fireplace. (I ended up not needing the logs because, WEIRD, I had a GAS fireplace. Oops.) Thankfully, the man (did I mention I was having a dinner guest?!) did his thing and got the fireplace going without blowing us up. Phew.

Saturday I did some shopping, watched the KU men's basketball team win its 10th game of the year. I wasted time watching movies and re-watching the So You Think You Can Dance top 6 dances. Then I put pins in my hair, green shadow on my eyelids, gray pumps on my feet and went downtown to see a big band (18 pieces!) and drink rum and cokes (please, don't tell my dentist or periodontist!)
Today I actually worked out (for the first time since before thanksgiving), went to the grocery store and made ranchburgers.

Ohmygosh, I have free time and I'm actually getting stuff done?! And enjoying the weekend? This is what I miss out on when I'm worrying 95% of the time about grad school work.

So yeah, grad school. Officially un-enrolled. I withdrew. I'm a grad school drop out. I should still probably let the program director know, but details schmetails. I'm glad I tried it. I'm also glad that I recognize it's not something I can continue. I've had my fill of classroom learning. I want to get out there and do things. Not write 20-page papers about the crappy funding state universities receive.

So, now I appreciate my free time now. And my ability to seek opportunities outside of school. After this year, after what I've tried, where I failed, what I've gained, the people I've met... I'm sure both wonderful and important things will happen next year. And now, I'll have more time to savor it all.

In a perfect world

Briana: When we have our own event planning company, our hours won't start until 10 AM (because of all of the late night events we'll have of course) but we'll aim to be at the gym together by 8 AM to exercise and get coffee. (at least in my head :) )
And every night a certain someone will sing me this song:


In a perfect world. I think I'll work on it.

But right now, I took the day off from work so I could work on my paper due for class on Thursday. So, I should probably actually do some writing.

December 9 Challenge. Something that really made you grow this year. That made you go to your edge and then some. What made it the best challenge of the year for you?

So, a few days late. But I'm really just being picky and choosy with this "best of 2009 blog thing". Sorry, I'm not yet a dedicated blogger!

What I learned? Sometimes you just judge people totally the wrong way and you make bad decisions. And even though you know (deep down) it's a bad decision you throw in some make-believe and it's the best thing ever. Then it changes. But you know what? The best thing about me, is that I learned from it. That I can appreciate new people for who they are and what they mean to me because you've seen your mistakes. And this is different. This is me, growing.

And then you laugh about it. And that feels REALLY good.


Also, on a completely unrelated note, is it wrong to "favorite your own tweets"? Because I've done that twice this week...